Wednesday 13 February 2019

In which disbelief reigns

Our building works have passed from comedy, through tragedy and straight into farce.

For those who are familiar with the oeuvre of Kevin McCloud, and his "Grand Designs", it is always the windows. Always. 

Our windows and doors were due on Monday, but did not arrive.

Then they were due on Tuesday, but did not arrive.

LittleBear, in what I initially dismissed as a histrionic fit, declared, "That's it! If they're not here today, they're never coming!" He even put in a full-blown, lip-trembling half sob to complete the dramatic performance.

Being a mature, sensible adult, with a firm grasp on how the real world operates, I told him that this was not a sensible stance, and that of course they would arrive, it was only a matter of 'when'.

And then, today, MrsBuilder contacted me.

After the previously mentioned tragedy, in which the lorry carrying the windows crashed, naturally the windows were re-ordered. We were given an estimated delivery date. MrsBuilder pursued the manufacturers as the delivery date approached, and was assured that all was in order. Until now.

It turns out that the left hand and the right hand of the window company are not on speaking terms. I'm not convinced that Right Hand even knows Left Hand exists. Because Left Hand happily acknowledged that the original delivery had failed and that they needed to make replacements. Meanwhile, when Right Hand received this information they appear to have shrugged and said, "Pah! This is just a copy of that order we've just finished, what a silly mistake, we'll chuck the order in the bin."

And thus it is that Left Hand has been happily confirming things with MrsBuilder, while Right Hand have been happily not making any windows and doors at all.

And thus it is that four months after paying a quite considerable sum of money for some quite considerable doors and windows, not only do we not have any doors and windows, but nobody has even started making them.

I think I would probably be more angry and upset about this if I weren't in a state of utterly bewildered shock. I find it hard to imagine how a company can operate in this way. I have occasionally had cause to be disparaging about my own company, but no matter how hard I try, I cannot imagine one half of the company acknowledging and confirming an order, while the other half unilaterally abandons it.

To her great credit, MrsBuilder has been right on it from the moment she discovered this situation, and already has a quote through for an alternative supplier, and is pursuing others as I type.

The original window company have, apparently, offered a £500 refund as some form of apology for their incompetence. I am pressing for this to be the case even if (when) we don't get them to attempt to make the windows for a third time. I have no idea whether I will succeed in this quest, as I don't actually have a contract with the original window company, I have a contract with my builders.

To be honest, the thought of arguing about compensation with my builders makes me feel more stressed and anxious than the thought of weeks and weeks of waiting for more bloody windows. Waiting doesn't involved interacting with other human beings. Arguing that four months without a trace of a window is unacceptable does involved interacting with other human beings. I don't like other human beings. I don't like interacting with other human beings. I think I feel slightly sick now...




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